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Thursday, December 15, 2005

THE BOX OF RAISINS

Many happy holiday experiences took place when I was still in the Elementary school...I loved those classroom exchange of gifts in  the last school day before the Christmas break. First,  you wrote your name on a piece of paper, roll it firmly like you do to a cigarette, then put it in a hat or a box..Then the container of names was passed around . Everyone, including the teacher, picked up one name..The teacher sometimes say " Do not put 2 of your names in the hat..you know what will happen to you if you are caught!" Sometimes you would wish you would get the name of the girl ( or boy ) on whom you have a crush but from Gr. 1 to Gr. 6, this never happened. ..One year, a boy took a name, unroll it and said.."Its my name!" But he was lying. He got the name of the male teacher. He put it back, shook the hat and picked up another name..It was the teacher's name again, and he tossed it back like a hot potato! On his 3rd try, he got the name of a pupil.. Every kid during that time seemed to be allergic to a male teacher!!

But a classic Christmas Gift story ( I don't know if you heard this one already ) is about the box of raisins..! The story goes like this ( at least the version I heard):

On the last day before the Christmas holiday, a boy asked his mother to buy for him a box of raisins. Which the Mother did..He said its going to be his gift to a classmate. When the Mother gave him the box, he opened it, smelled it ( it smelled good! ) then he tasted one..then two..and pretty soon half of the raisins were gone!

Now the kid is in trouble. There was no more time to buy a new one. Besides he might get his ears pinched by his mother if she learned  he ate something that did not belong to him.

 Below their house was a pet goat. An idea popped into his head..He went down, picked some dried goat droppings..He inverted the box, put the goat droppings in the bottom part of the raisin box. So the half top of the box were real raisins, but the bottom half, well you know what it was...! He wrapped the box, wrote the name of lucky kid plus his name as a donor..He figured,  he will eat the raisins when he gets home and it will be 2 weeks before he would see him again..

To cut to the chase, everybody, including our main character, got presents..Everybody OPENED their presents and from the corner of his eye, he saw his classmate's face lit like a Christmas tree light when he opened his gift..Raisins seemed to be a favorite during that time..the Sunmaid brand..you know the one with a picture of a girl against a red background who is laughing, like she knows what will happen next!

Then the boy started eating the raisins...Slowly first..then he picked up his eating speed..Our hero wanted to go home already but it the teacher did not dismiss the class yet..And jumping out of the classroom window is out of question.

All of a sudden, the boy stopped chewing. He poured the rest of the raisins into his palm..The he started to cry and went to the teacher: "Sir, somebody gave me goat s...t!"

"Who gave it to you??" bellowed the teacher..Luckily, the wrapping was intact so they found out immediately who the lucky giver was!.. "Hey you! Come here.." The boy knew he was now up shit creek without a paddle..The teacher grabbed him by the arm and asked:"Did you give him a box of goat droppings?" "Sir, not all of it were goat droppings..just half .." At least our hero told the truth..During those days, justice is swift and some teachers do not believe in sparing the rod..or the ruler..The teacher turned him around, took a ruler and whacked him 5 times on his bare legs, the fleshy part at the back..The boy who ate goat droppings stopped crying  when he saw the culprit started to cry too, out of guilt and embarrassment of being punished in front of the class!

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