ASINGAN SOUND SYSTEMS

As a  a kid, I accompanied the Sampaga Sound System for a couple of times..I guess that is how I got hooked with stereo sound systems a hobby which I am still doing in my retirement. ( Now I learned how to digitize vinyl records and audio tapes and do loops and weird stuff with the audio files)

I loved it for a while especially . when you  work for a wedding event. They served you the newly cooked pinapaitan with steaming rice  at  midnight after the cooks were already done with some menus. But this culinary perk did  not happen always.

Then I remember in the 50s, we assisted a New Year's Eve program in the Dupac Elementary School. It was the Sampaga Sound System with another Asingan sound system ( Gee I wish I could remember whose it was ! ) Anyway we played our music for 15 mins. then he played his music for about the same time. Our sound system sounded like crap ( it was my brother in law's FIRST sound system ) and the other guy had this powerful and smooth sounding amplifier. It was not really a competition but each time the other guy played his stuff, he really blew us out of the water.

But my brother in law never gave up.He updated his equipment.Years later he became the most sought after Sound System in Asingan and he serviced weddings, town dances, funerals (!) and other events..He never run out of work and that was his bread-and-butter for a long time.Plus he also took pictures. In fact the Sampaga family were the pioneer photographers in Asingan. 

Going back to the sound system business,  Lilo ( my brod in law's nickname ) used a calesa to transport his gizmos. I remember one of his transport helpers was Marcelo Abobo ( see article STORY OF TWO KINGS )..Thus Marcelo also moonlighted as a Disc Jockey for my brother in law..They would leave at 5:00 pm and come back home at around 4:00 am the next day. We could tell when they come home because as Marcelo's carromata pulled in inside our front yard, all of the the fricking dogs ( about 5 of them , ours and Sampaga's) would start barking like hell waking us all up and the whole neighbourhood for that matter.

Now a days, the Sampaga System is still very much alive. It is now run by my nephew, Teofilo's  son and he uses modern lights and speakers and high powered amps..And co incidentally, his nameis Teofilo Sampaga Jr. A chip off the old block you might say.---#

CHRISTMAS BALL IN DIFFERENT ASINGAN BARRIOS

I was one of those "bumabaili", in Asingan I like "baili" starting it when I was 15 and I ending up my itchy wichy in my early 20's. It was fun, a lot of fun! How about you? Every first week of December I started  hearing in the barrios those noisy loud speakers miles away. Either it was Estrada Sound System or Orpia Sound.System..., They were great sound systems in Asingan at that time. They have a good selection of new songs too.. Remember those SP45 and LP33 records?He!he! Noisemakers, weren't they? What amused me in these Christmas balls: before the  guys started picking  their dance partners, they roamed around like hunters stalking their prey.. "Who would be a good prey tonight?". Naturally, the "targets" would be the pretty and "meaty" ones. He!he! It is so shameful for those ladies left behind just making  holes on their seats(para abut iti tugaw). The men lined like thirsty and hungry wolves eyeing the sheeps (the pretty ladies)...

I like Estrada's sound system better than anyone else especially if the the DJs are the young brothers(Roger, Jimmy and Ap-ping). They were  good operators and the music they played were so cool.. But when the younger brothers weren't there, either the father(Lakay Marcelo) or the 3 elder brothers worked as a DJ's, they spin Sinatra, Nat king Cole, Johnny Mathis songs, or cha chas,tangos, swings, etc.( those old songs from the 50's and 60's). We hated those songs!!..

Christmas ball is supposed to be for youngsters and teenagers, you know! We wanted new songs, new music like modern and discos!.Even the ladies  step back and sometimes don't wanna dance anymore.

My friends and I were busy come December every year..Hey, I was the John Travolta of Asingan at that time, you know.. 70's was the era of discos, salsa and el bimbo whatever you wanna call them! I had lots of fun of dancing.!!Sometimes I visited different barrios in just one night!.. Wow! The John Travolta of Asingan was always busy and popular...Having no transportation, I did not go alone ..One of my friends owned a tricycle and he liked baili too. So, there you go. Those moments still linger in my mind, I miss them so much!.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all!

----Arsenio Macanas

note: I visited Asingan in 2003, the sound systems have improved a lot! They now have these high powered and huge speakers used by Rock Bands in the US/Canada...My nephew, the son of Teofilo Sampaga operates one set ( it is his side line ) and they are really powerful..He also play the modern sounds like hip-hop, rap, etc..He said that Fr. Gelacio was the one selling some really good accesories which he brought home from the US..It is so sad that he died early this year.He was also knowledgeable in electronics..

----Vic Costes

THOUGHTS AFTER A HOLIDAY

I guess it is better to be late than never and yes: we're back from our holiday trip driving  from the Gulf Coast to the Pacific Coast.  It was nice being on the beach during and after Christmas: swimming,fishing and picking up shells that come in after a big splash of wave.Nice to be with  Mother Nature during the Christmas Season. That is when  I felt His love and I just had to open my eyes and held my hand up and say "Thank you very much for Your love!!"

Happy New Year everyone!!!

--Annie Cano

Christmas reunion photos

Here are a few photos from our annual family reunion last Dec. 24...Guests started arriving at 4:00 pm..The roasted pig checked in at 4:30..MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

A TORONTO TRAGEDY

I never reprint any newspaper story on my web page... up to now..On the afternoon of Boxing day ( a Canadian Holiday after Christmas ), I was in the neighbourhood of Yonge/Dundas.  I have been visiting this area on Boxing Day for the past 20 years. I  thanked God I was not within the area where the actual shooting took place. I was a block away, but I saw the screaming crowd rushed towards my direction for safety. It was a terrifying moment for who would think that a shoot out, just like what we see in movies would happen..And those pistol toting desperadoes were using live bullets!

The Toronto Police were swift to cordon the area with yellow tapes and two Police cruisers blocked a part of Yonge street in front of Sam the Record Man and HMV. All of a sudden, the Boxing Day crowd evaporated from this area appearing somewhere else  blocks away. HMV started putting 25% off yellow tags on their wares just to attract more customers back..

The police were busy picking up bullet fragments, shells and of course, interviewing people.

Torontonians, including me, felt overwhelmed when a while ago, the police released the photo of the victim..She was a beautiful Gr. 10 student of a Toronto High School.Toronto again was smeared with the blood of an innocent child.And on a day which we celebrate in the Philippines as Ninios Innocentes.

Here is a clipping of the story..

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Toronto police release name, details of shooting victim

Toronto Police have released a name and other details about a 15-year-old girl who was shot and killed on Boxing Day when gunfire broke out in a downtown area bustling with shoppers.

At a news conference late Wednesday, Det. Savas Kyriacou identified the victim as Jane Creba.

  "Jane was a Grade 10 student at Riverdale Collegiate," Kyriacou said.

He also released the results of a post-mortem examination.

"Cause of death was determined to be a bullet wound to the body."

Creba's family had initially asked that her name not be released.

Some witnesses had previously told reporters the girl was shopping with her family when a bullet hit her head.

'Significant progress' in probe: police chief

Earlier in the day, the city's police chief said his force was making "very significant progress" in investigating the shootings, which also left six people with injuries.

Bill Blair told CBC News that police have a number of leads and are awaiting the results of forensic, ballistic and DNA tests.

A lot of information is coming in from witnesses at the scene. Investigators are also reviewing video taken in the area of the shooting, he said.

"The investigation is very active and we're making very significant progress and I'm very confident we'll get to the bottom of this and bring the people responsible to justice."

Gang feud may have spurred shooting: reports

A feud between rival gang members may have sparked the shooting, published reports said.

A gentleman pauses to light a candle at a makeshift memorial where the Yonge Street shooting took place.

Police believe 10 to 15 people in their late teens to early 20s from two different groups were involved in an exchange of gunfire on busy Yonge Street near the Eaton Centre, the reports said.

Within an hour of the shooting, police arrested two young men at a nearby subway station, where they recovered a gun. By Wednesday, it was still uncertain if the two were involved in the violence. No charges had been laid.

Police said there could be more arrests.

The shooting happened just before dinnertime Monday as shoppers crowded the sidewalks of Yonge Street, just north of the tourist-heavy Eaton Centre.

Creba was ''the funniest, prettiest and all around nicest person,' classmate writes

Toronto Police Chief Bill Blair said witnesses have been providing a lot of information about the shooting.

Creba was declared dead in hospital following the 5:19 p.m. shooting. Witnesses said she had been standing outside a Foot Locker store when she was hit.

"She was honest to God the funniest, prettiest and all around nicest person...," one classmate wrote about her on a blog. "I can't think of a single person who didn't like her and everyone loved laughing and joking with her. Shehad the nicest fun-loving attitude towards everything and I know that everyone will miss her."

Creba, who lived in the city's east end, has been described as a top student and excellent athlete.

Six other people – four males and two females – were taken to hospital.

"One person, a male, is in critical condition," police said.

Police have said all the victims were innocent bystanders.

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A FEEDBACK FROM GEMMA

They're doing good, thank you.  They were over Christmas Day.  I read all your stories in your site and enjoyed it.  I also remember the Manianita, a group of "Bayanihan ni Cristo" members in which you are the leader will go serenade the person whose birthday is on that day.  That was done early in
the morning.  I remember being up so early on my Dad's birthday to wait anxiously for the serenaders.  I just thought I want to mention you this, it was heartwarming.  I will talk to you later.  Take care and Happy New Year.

Gemma

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Gemma's e-mail remind me of the Cursillo Days in Asingan..I was part of that team with Manong Fred, Gemma's dad. There are lots of fun attending those post cursillio seasons. Then one would hunger listening to more talks about spirituality..Of course, the brotherhood of the Asinganians who spent a week end in Binmaley is unquestionable..They call each other "brod" or "sis"..We went to church as regular as we can. But deep inside ourselves we know we are far from being "saints" but like some of the "born again Christians"  for a moment we were touched by the Spirit of God and it was up for the individual person whether to go on treading the path of the Spirit or go to the usual way of living..But we learned  Christian Love which is unconditional love; loving those who hate you, and carrying this love in your heart to the end, because one day when our eyes will close in death, it is this love which might open the door to that other life which we in our mortal state can never know, imagine or visualize.

**********

I remember the Manianitas..Sometimes the Cursillistas, out of brotherly fun would call it Manganita.."Mangan manen" they would say..Who would not miss those tasty menus they would serve the serenaders after they are invited inside the house at daybreak.I can list down those dishes but I dont want to. It would just make my mouth water and my stomach grumble! ...Asingan hospitality knows no limit. Then there would be the jokes, chats and singing if a guitar is brought along..As one song says: "Those were the days, my friend I thought they'd never end..."

HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!!!!

 

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A Feedback

My sis Ester wrote:Thanks for the children's pictures. We enjoyed them. Bakit $2.30 lang binigay mo kay emma? Mabuti napakanta mo..

To which I answered:

 Emma, at her age, really does  not care how much you give her, she does not know yet how to count money..! But shes very particular about promises and she nails me each time I forget one..Besides if I give her  money( say $5.00 bill ), she  would misplace them...

There is a store just in front of our house and every time she visited us last summer, she always drag me  there..   One time, we went to the store..I asked her:" do you have money?" She said "Yes"...So we went in and she picked out various candies that cost close to 10$.."Okay, give me your money," I said..She pulled money from her pocket and give me 1$ plus change.."Thats all the money I have," she said.   Fortunately I always have my wallet with me..I did not have the heart to tell her the money is not enough, I just paid for it and she enjoy her goodies in our backyard...   Grandchildren: I wish they would never grow up...  

 

HOLY NIGHT IN TORONTO

A Funny thing happened during the singing of O HOLY NIGHT..Even if I played this song for the nth time during Christmas Eve, something new always happen.

 

Last year, Kim, Mia and Caitlin sang this beautiful Christmas hymn, this year Emma took Kim's place ( I am sure Kim did not mind very much, anyway all 4 of them are like sisters and friends)..The singing took place after the Communion when all the people have gone back to their seats and Father Bob told them to "relax, sit back and enjoy the song.." Which they did and so Emma started with verse 1. No hitch. Mia did verse 2. No hitch either. Then Caitlin did verse 3 with the finale. The audience broke into an applause after her last note. I did not notice what was happening with the 3 because I was so concentrated with my playing..

 

Then Michelle, my daughter told us as we walked out of church to her car. She said right after her part while her 2 co-singers were doing their bit, Emma was doing a dance..It was what her Mom call a "pee-pee dance.." Turned out she did not go to the bathroom before going up the platform. You know how kids do not like to go to the John not until they start wetting their pants.  When I checked the video which Michelle took, she was really dancing..At one point she cupped her groin trying to hold it back, I think..She waited until her Mom took her right after the audience applauded and both of them went to the washroom downstairs in the basement..

Wow, I said..that was a close one! It was good she did not break her water when she reached for that high note in the song!---#

T'WAS THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS...

 

I slept at about 2:00 am ( early by previous standards; one Christmas 5 years ago, friends and I just talked until 7:00 am, Christmas Day went to sleep and woke up at 1:00 pm ). The house was a mess of course, but I do not mind. It is a sign that the kids and the grandkids were here and they had a grand time.

The house is cold at the time of writing because I usually turn down the thermostat before hitting the sack and,  I have not raised it up yet. So before I went down to my basement where my Computer is, I took the jacket I used last night during the mass and put it over my pajamas. I checked one pocket. It has 2 $ and30 cents in change..Aha, this would start the story rolling.

The money belongs to Emma Forbes whose cute face you must have seen in some of the pages in the Asingan Journal. I gave the money to her and then hours later, she gave it to me for safekeeping and in the hulabaloo of opening gifts and playing with all her cousins, she forgot all about it. Let us start from the beginning.

About 2 weeks ago in church, I wanted her to sing just after a Sunday Mass was finished so I can hear how she sounds in the church microphones.. She shook her head and if a 6 year old shakes her head, you can not do anything about it. Except promise her some money. Which I did and her head shake became a nod. So, I sat down in front of the organ, played the intro and she started the verse 1 of O HOLY NIGHT. She did it a couple of times, after which she ran off with her friends to check an ongoing bake sale in the basement. When I got home, I forgot about my promise to her and she did not remind it to me either. Not until last night, Dec. 24 at our house.

So almost everybody was in our house in the usual Christmas eve activity. Then I asked Emma again who was doing a Kelly Clarkson Karaoke in the TV room.." How about a song for our guests?"..Uh-uh she said with the headshake. "I will give you money" I said. "You promised that in church but you did not give me any.." she answered just like that.

Ooops, I realized my error. I dug into my pocket, here is some money, I will pay you in advance. How about that?"It was $2.30 . Here, take it..She had a pocket in her skirt and she slid it in there.She did not even count it. Money is money to her and she does not bother how much it is. It seems it symbolizes a promise redeemed. In this case, she won! .So she went beside the piano, I did the intro, and she sang the same song in front of everyday. Then she went back to the TV room to join her friends.

When I related the money incident, everyone was in stiches.

As the start of the Mass drew near, I ordered her and her sister Mia to get dressed. They did and Emma came to me again and said "My church dress has no pocket in it..Can you keep for the meantime.? So I took it and slid it in my jacket's pocket and we all went out into the rainy night. It was a wet Christmas in Toronto last night.

Well, they sang in 2 masses. One incident during the singing will be the topic of another entry. In the meantime, I must keep the $2.30 somewhere safe. If I lose it or spend it accidentally, I will be in big trouble.

URAY BASSIT LAENG ( Even if it is just a little one )

Christmas is a wonderful time of  the year. Christmas is a time to celebrate with family, relatives, and loved ones. Christmas is also a time to give thanks to people  we appreciate.

When I was a little boy, my mother told me that it is better to give than to receive; “Uray bassit laeng”  she quoted. When my parents migrated to United States, they strived and made sacrifices to earn a living. My parents assured  our relatives that we would remain connected. So every Christmas, they sent either a “Door to Door” box or some money.

“Uray bassit laeng.” Tomorrow is Christmas, and it is important to remember our family, loved ones, and relatives who are in the Philippines by giving something; “ Uray bassit laeng.”

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

---Danny Nitcha

HAVE A HAPPY ( AND HUMOROUS ) CHRISTMAS!

Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged (MGA SIRA, HA-HA!)

Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear?

Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Queens Disoriented Are

Amnesia - I Don't Know if I'll Be Home for Christmas

Narcissistic - Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

Manic - Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Street and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants

Paranoid - Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me

Borderline Personality Disorder - Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ....

Agoraphobia - I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day but Couldn't Leave My House

Autistic - Jingle Bell Rock and Rock and Rock and Rock and Rock and Rock

Senile Dementia - Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles from My House in My Slippersand Robe

Oppositional Defiance Disorder - I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House

Social Anxiety Disorder - Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas While I Sit Here and Hyperventilate

HO-HO-HO-HO!!!!

WHY DID THE PIG CROSS THE ROAD?

Feedback from Edith: Re: Two Kings...

Very interesting little stories!  Brings back nostalgic memories!  I love those calesa and cariton rides. I remember when were kids, our parents would take us to the barrio on a calesa.  If we overstayed, there won’t be any calesa available, so our parents would ask the tenants to take us back to town via a cariton pulled by a cow (not by a nuang because the cow can run faster).  It took us forever to get back to town but we enjoyed the bumpy cariton rides.

 

The Story of Two Kings ( Not a Christmas Story )

Long before the tricycle drivers took over the streets of Asingan, the King of the Road was the Kutsero and his Karomata. This quaint rig was also known as a calesa. Its a kind of horse-and-buggy and Asingenios at that time used this transportation to go to the market , or to the riverside ( The Agno Chico River ) to wash clothes on Saturdays. Or to do some errands that need transport like buying a piglet, vegetables or go to social events at night ( like barrio dances, wedding affairs ) and what have you..The calesa did not make a hell's-a-poppin noise like those tricycles do or they do not dare go into the McArthur highway posing a threat to the fast going motor vehicles there..As one song by Sylvia la Torre said, "it is the ride of lovers..Just close the curtains and you have the privacy to do certain amenities.." Which was nice.

In Asingan I remember two "kings"..I call them such because they are the most popular cocheros in town. One was Marcelo Abobo and the other is an old man from Macalong. I do not know his real name, but townspeople just call him DURODOR. I will tell you the meaning of the word as soon as we get into his bio.

Marcelo or Selong is a short, pleasant faced, always smiling chap with mascular built.Thus local bums would not dare rip him off with money otherwise they might lose a few teeth in exchange for a few nickels and dimes. Won't be a fair trade.  Conversing with him was a very plesant experience and if you are not careful, soon you might spill your innermost secrets. Which could be dangerous too. But he is a simple minded, hard working guy who loved his horse since he earns his bread and butter. He always bought grass for him on the way home after a days work. You would see bundles of grass on the roadside for sale at that time. A young kid who liked to have some pocket money would gather the grass in the field for he know that sooner or later, it will be bought by kutseros who wont have time to pick them. Thus horses do not need gas or oil, they subsist on TLC -Tender love and care - plus some rice bran and molasses every now and then.

During those days, women seldom if ever wear jeans. It is a no-no. Mothers and grandmothers would give heck to their daughters for using the pants in public.."You look lie a boy!" or some other reasons which by today's standards would sound very asinine. So girls then wear skirts. I heard an anecdote about Selong. As a pretty girl rides on his carromata, the story goes, thats the time he checks the horse left leg for some bruises. Passengers always step on a contraption on the right side of the so she/he can ascend the carromata.This contraption is quite high from the ground. The women's skirts would really be raised as they step up into the rig.So our friend Selong would hit 2 birds with one stone at that instant: the condition of the horse left leg and the color of the passenger's underpants.

The other kutsero is DURODOR..He got this name because one time, while he was transporting an impatient passenger, his horse was not going any faster than expected. He whacked him with a horsewhip, yet the poor beast could not go any faster..Maybe he was already as old as his master. So the irate passenger said in a loud voice: "Durodoremon!" Just one Ilocano word but the English translation is quite long. It means:"Stick your whip handle up his ass!" From that time on he was known more by that name.

The old guy had an ongoing love affair with the bottle. At the middle of the day, he was already rosy pink and smelling like a chico fruit.. He sang sometimes as he went on his way, so who needs a radio? One time, the story goes, he drank too much that he just laid down on the floor of his rig, singing as loud as ever. But his horse, they say has more sense than his master. He would start walking and would bring home: rig, drunken master and all when it is time to go home at twillight!.

TORONTO'S WONDERLAND

TORONTO'S WONDERLAND

Old Man Winter visited Toronto again last night, December 15 and it dumped about 20 centimeters of the white stuff everywhere. In the morning, the snowfall stopped. Yesterday evening and this morning, I shoveled snow especially in the driveway part that joins the street. Dixon Road where we live becomes Airport Road as it crosses the boundary to Missisauga.Meaning all cars, trucks, bikes, vans and other modes of transport pass by Dixon to and from Pearson International Airport. It could be as busy as hell sometimes. So, it is the priority for the City to clear Dixon road after a heavy snowfall. First they salt the streets ( and they are not using the average table salt ) to melt the snow then the big snowplows would come to clear the snow dumping it into the sidewalks.One is the sidewalk in front of my frontyard, sealing my driveway with a small barricade of snow with salt. If you do not shovel at once this snow-with-salt mixture, it freezes into a solid, rock hard wall which you can't remove anymore even with a pick axe.. Your driveway will be sealed permanently until warm weather arrives. Your visitors will be unhappy because they have to park their cars in the side streets close to your house. Meaning they will walk on slippery sidewalks to reach your door.

Cleaning up my driveway took me 45 mins to 1 hour.Being a Senior, I have to watch my back and not to slide otherwise, I might continue my retirement on a wheel chair. Thats the bad thing about winter here.Vancouver is the only Canadian province with milder winters because of its proximity to the Pacific Ocean..

Now the good news..Snow on the shrubs and trees surrounding the house gave me some pretty subjects to shoot and to post in the Internet..So after my work, and before the winds would blow away the snow from the branches and shrubs, I went clicking away some photos with a digital camera. Downloading the photos on the Internet is just a child's play once you selected the good shots from the bad--#

more photos

THE BOX OF RAISINS

Many happy holiday experiences took place when I was still in the Elementary school...I loved those classroom exchange of gifts in  the last school day before the Christmas break. First,  you wrote your name on a piece of paper, roll it firmly like you do to a cigarette, then put it in a hat or a box..Then the container of names was passed around . Everyone, including the teacher, picked up one name..The teacher sometimes say " Do not put 2 of your names in the hat..you know what will happen to you if you are caught!" Sometimes you would wish you would get the name of the girl ( or boy ) on whom you have a crush but from Gr. 1 to Gr. 6, this never happened. ..One year, a boy took a name, unroll it and said.."Its my name!" But he was lying. He got the name of the male teacher. He put it back, shook the hat and picked up another name..It was the teacher's name again, and he tossed it back like a hot potato! On his 3rd try, he got the name of a pupil.. Every kid during that time seemed to be allergic to a male teacher!!

But a classic Christmas Gift story ( I don't know if you heard this one already ) is about the box of raisins..! The story goes like this ( at least the version I heard):

On the last day before the Christmas holiday, a boy asked his mother to buy for him a box of raisins. Which the Mother did..He said its going to be his gift to a classmate. When the Mother gave him the box, he opened it, smelled it ( it smelled good! ) then he tasted one..then two..and pretty soon half of the raisins were gone!

Now the kid is in trouble. There was no more time to buy a new one. Besides he might get his ears pinched by his mother if she learned  he ate something that did not belong to him.

 Below their house was a pet goat. An idea popped into his head..He went down, picked some dried goat droppings..He inverted the box, put the goat droppings in the bottom part of the raisin box. So the half top of the box were real raisins, but the bottom half, well you know what it was...! He wrapped the box, wrote the name of lucky kid plus his name as a donor..He figured,  he will eat the raisins when he gets home and it will be 2 weeks before he would see him again..

To cut to the chase, everybody, including our main character, got presents..Everybody OPENED their presents and from the corner of his eye, he saw his classmate's face lit like a Christmas tree light when he opened his gift..Raisins seemed to be a favorite during that time..the Sunmaid brand..you know the one with a picture of a girl against a red background who is laughing, like she knows what will happen next!

Then the boy started eating the raisins...Slowly first..then he picked up his eating speed..Our hero wanted to go home already but it the teacher did not dismiss the class yet..And jumping out of the classroom window is out of question.

All of a sudden, the boy stopped chewing. He poured the rest of the raisins into his palm..The he started to cry and went to the teacher: "Sir, somebody gave me goat s...t!"

"Who gave it to you??" bellowed the teacher..Luckily, the wrapping was intact so they found out immediately who the lucky giver was!.. "Hey you! Come here.." The boy knew he was now up shit creek without a paddle..The teacher grabbed him by the arm and asked:"Did you give him a box of goat droppings?" "Sir, not all of it were goat droppings..just half .." At least our hero told the truth..During those days, justice is swift and some teachers do not believe in sparing the rod..or the ruler..The teacher turned him around, took a ruler and whacked him 5 times on his bare legs, the fleshy part at the back..The boy who ate goat droppings stopped crying  when he saw the culprit started to cry too, out of guilt and embarrassment of being punished in front of the class!

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Sa hirap maghanap ng trabaho sa panahon ngayon, pati pag se-salesman ng vacumm cleaner ay pinasok ko na. 

 Minsan, pumunta ako sa isang bahay sa isang barangay. Kumatok ako sa pinto... Isang malaking misis ang nagbukas sa akin. Pero bago nakapagsalita ang babae, inunahan ko sya. mabilis akong pumasok papunta sa sala nila para di na makatangi sa presentation ko. 

 Katulad ng utos ng boss ko, binuksan ko ang isang plastic bag ng sm at ibinuhos lahat ng lamang tae ng kalabaw sa carpet. This was a technique taught to me In selling to get a massive and immediate attention from the buyer. 

 Sabi ko sa kanya w/ confidence: "Misis, pag di nalinis ng vacuum cleaner ko NGAYON ang mga tae sa carpet niyo, kakainin ko isa-isa yan!", ang mayabang na sinambit ko.

"Gusto mo ng ketsup para diyan?"

 Sabi ko, "Bakit po?"

 "Eh, kalilipat lang namin. wala pa kaming kuryente."

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Name the States

The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week.



He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name.



They came up with about 40 names.



He jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states.



One lad raised his hand and said, "Yes, but in those days there were only 13."

**********************

Gift wraping

A very tight man was looking for a gift for a girlfriend.



Everything was too expensive, except for a broken glass vase which he
could purchase for almost nothing.



He asked the store to send it, hoping his friend would think it had been
broken in transit.



In due time, the man received an acknowledgement from his friend.



"Thanks for the vase," it read. "It was so thoughtful of you to wrap each
piece separately."

************************** 

TWO TRAGEDIES

Asingan in the 50's was a laid back, peaceful town except for that night when a group of armed men attempted to burglarize Moniang's rice mill. We were already sound asleep when a series of popping sounds jarred our deep slumber. "Gunshots!" exclaimed my Father who was also the excitable type and he told us to go to the living room. Our bedrooms faced the main street and the rice mill is just about a 100 feet away. He looked out of our window and a few more shots were heard. In the moonless night, the gun barrels spouted sparkling beads looking and sounding like firecrackers. After the second volley of shots, there came an eerie silence. We heard shouts and running footsteps that dissapeared. The burglars seemd to have run away.

It was said that one person ran to the Presidencia by way of the Catholic church yard to ask for help. Some ten minutes later, we heard the shuffling of feet and they stopped near our house..One policeman shouted "Moniang, are they still there??.." What a moronic question to ask; what did the guy think? Would Moniang know whether they left? Was he watching the shootout from an open window, maybe through some night vision googles? The cops finally went to the scene of the crime to find one dead body and a houseful of scared witnesses..

The next day, everybody was talking about the crime: in barbershops, in the market in dinner tables.. The fatality was a relative of Nana Talen..He was shot, a friend of mine who is close to the family said, because as the robbers were trying to open a door, he switched on his flashlight on the would be robber. One robbery suspect shot at the flashlight. The victim was hit at close range. They never caught the suspects.

************************************

The second tragedy that befell Monyang was the big fire that the town thought would wipe him out forever.At first it was just a small fire manifested by a small column of black smoke plummeting up the sky. It is amazing how something small could become so big and destructive if nothing is done about it.

Being a rice mill, there was lot of fire hazards inside: diesel fuel for the engines, the sacks of palay to be milled, the empty burlap sacks and the dry, structural timber that made up the whole building.Plus there were no fire extinguishers in the plant and the town had no fire truck. Water sources would be hand pumps, wells, artisian wells plus an old fashioned bucketbrigade that would bring the water to the burning building via human hands. 

Soon we saw the wall of flame getting bigger and wider. Burning debris, like lethal beautiful flowers could be seen flying and dancing on the wind whipped into motion by the rising temperature. And the Asinganians, having not seen a major fire before, formed an audience watching the fire like it was a movie set...Even as noon time passed, there was no sign of the fire abating. My mother started packing some clothes out of anticipation for the worse. Other houses were closer to the burning building than ours: the Suratos residence was just across the street, then the deMesa building was just a neighbour of the Suratos family. The Romero residence ( house of my Kumpare Alex ) was just on the right side of the blazing inferno. And experience shows you can never expect what the fire would do next.

Then came that one big explosion causing one small cloud of fire that rose up in a flash then came down just as fast as it went up. The onlookers screamed and ran away thinking the fire would eat them too.I also felt a momentary heat on my cheeks.All the time I was watching the hellish spectacle from the second floor window of our house. It was believed that the fire reached a pile of gasoline tanks ( or some other volatile substance )somewhere and it just exploded in flames.In a few minutes, the onlookers started trekking back to watch the rest of the "show.." There were no more big explosions after that.

 

Then the fire gradually dwindled, only because there was nothing more to feed on. The fire gradually reduced itself into a small bonfire, just like in the beginning. The people did not go away immediately. They waited until dark then spectators just came and went as if it was a sideshow, a freak exhibit, or something to gawk at. The next morning found some people going over what remained of the rice mill...Some said they found a few blackened coins, some say the place smelled like a mixture of burning rubber, ( rubber takes time to burn ) smell of burnt rice ( like somebody left the rice pot over a burning fire ). Again it is so hard to control people in a small town especially when there is such a small police force. I saw what was left of the rice mill the next day on my way to and from the school in Dupac. The people just came and went until they found no valuable coins in the ruins and they just stopped coming. In a few days, their curiosity was satsfied. Show is over. The End.

 

Locals thought that that was the end of Moniang. But in a few weeks, the construction of a bigger, better CONO started. The rice mill rose again like the mythical bird, the Phoenix.It might have been arson, who knows? There was no Criminal Investigating Unit  in Asingan at that time. They said the "Chinese Brotherhood" among the Chinese Community in Pangasinan  helped Moniang  stand on his feet again. The truth behind this incident was burned and buried with the  blackened ruins of the building. This happened almost 60 years ago. This building is still there in the same spot up to this day.

ARENT YOU GLAD YOU ARE NOT IN TORONTO?

Everything was normal as as we went to bed last night  Dec. 8..It was cold, but the streets were clear. There was a prediction about the arrival of snow, just 5 cms. When we woke up Dec. 9, it was 15-20 cms of the white stuff landed on our doorstep. Routine schedules were screwed up. Schoolkids were driven to school by the parents instead of the usual school bus. Oh well this is nothing. Wait until an Ice Storm would come ( Jan. or February ) today would be a picnic day compared to that!!

Some e-mails ( or blogs )

Name: Remi Gonzalez
Town_City:
EmailAddress: To Vic
Remote Name: 64.236.243.16
Date: Friday, December 09, 2005

Message

I envy you that you can write fluent Ilocano. I also had an Ilocano blood being born in Camiling, Tarlac where my mother was raised and grew up. I went to Camiling Elem. School till Grade 3 then the whole family moved to Cubao, Quezon City during the early 50's where we all grew up. I took my intermediate and high school at Manila public schools.So, at my early age I suddenly became Manila boy missing all the simple life in the barrio. Going back to Camiling, Tarlac, we have also a very famous and great son, General Carlos P. Romulo. A stateman and a writer. This was also the hometown of Leonor Rivera, the sweetheart of Jose Rizal who married an Engineer Kipping. I never failed to pass by Camiling market everytime I go to Lingayen to buy their famous chicharon. It's the best if you had it in pinakbet. Between pinakbet and steak I would go for pinakbet. Happy blogging.

*****************

Name: Vic Costes
Town_City:
EmailAddress: for my co-bloggers Arsenio and Remi
Remote Name: 152.163.101.14
Date: Friday, December 09, 2005

Message

Thank you for ur message, Remi..I seldom write in Ilocano. Emotionally, there are so many things you can say in Ilocano which you can never express in English. But I do not know many Ilocano words which the people born in Ilocandia would know by heart.. I also appreciate the lyrics ( and tunes )of the classic Ilocano love songs: TA NAGSAWAY A PINTAS MO, BIAG KEN BILEG, etc. I play these pieces on my grandaughter's piano which she left in our house so my fingers would resist whatever problems that would start to affect them if they are idle..Going back to Ilocano, you could not use NAGSAWAY, or UMASPING in Asingan. They would raise their eyebrows at you. Or UN-ONNOY but I learned all these Ilocano words from these Ilocano Love Songs which are an integral part of our cultural heritage..It is so ironic that once you are out of the Philippines that is the time when you would start appreciating our native culture in terms of literature, poetry and music. By the way, we went to Camiling one time with the choir back in the '60s for a caroling stint. The assistant priest at that time came from Camiling. He is Fr. Geronimo Marcelino. Arsenio, your aunt Brigida will surely recognize this name. If I am not mistaken, she came with the group for that overnight trip to Camiling...

This is really funny!

KUMIRIRING ang telepono nang madaling araw....

"Hello, Master Carlos? Si Arnaldo po ito, 'yung katiwala niyo sa bahay-bakasyunan niyo."

"O, Mr. Arnaldo, ikaw pala. Ano't napatawag ka? May problema ba?

"Um, napatawag lang po ako para abisuhan kayo na namatay ang alaga niyong parrot."

"'Yung parrot kong si Pikoy, patay? 'Yung nanalo sa bird show?

"Opo, Master Carlos, 'yun na nga po."

"Putris ... sayang! Ang laki pa naman ng nagastos ko sa ibong 'yon. Hay, buhay! Teka, ano nga ba ang ikinamatay niya?"

"E, kumain po kasi ng bulok na karne...."

"Bulok na karne? At sino namang salbaheng tao ang nagpakain sa kanya ng bulok na karne?"

"W-Wala po. Nanginain po siya ng karne ng isang patay na kabayo."

"Patay na kabayo? Anong patay na kabayo, Mr Arnaldo?"

"E, 'yun pung mga thoroughbred horses niyo, Sir. Namatay po kasi lahat sila sa pagod, kahihila ng kariton ng tubig."

"Nasisiraan ka na ba ng bait? Anong kariton ng tubbbiiiiggggg?"

"'Yun pong pinampatay namin ng sunog."

"Diyos ko po! Anong sunog naman 'yang pinagsasasabi mo?"

"'Yun pong halos tumupok sa bahay niyo.... Tumumba po 'yung isang nakasinding kandila, tapos nagliyab 'yung kurtina at mabilis na kumalat ang apoy...."

"Ano? Puuut.... E, may kuryente naman diyan sa bahay-bakasyunan, a. Para saan 'yung kandila?"

"Para sa burol po."

"Ano? Kaninong burol?

"Sa nanay n'yo po, Sir. Bigla kasi siya dumating dito nu'ng isang gabi, walang kaabi-abiso. Lampas hatinggabi na. Akala ko po magnanakaw. Binaril ko."

A couple of e-mails I want to share....

Hi Vic: You really have a good memory of the (past) bygone years. I could still remember when we were choir members, they always talk about the good food after the mass but I do not remember myself eating at the convent. Christmas in Asingan is really one of the happiest moment of my childhood or as a teenager. Yes the band going around the town playing that meaningful happiest Christmas  local music I ever heard is overpowering  to me as a child, teenager, or even now .  That music really is  as local as local can get. Its one of the best if not the best Christmas local symphony in the Philippines or this world of Christmas holiday.. I only wish that their  is CD of that music playing by our band in Asingan. If only I have time to go there I also want to Video those people who are playing that band I hope they are still alive. I know you know Nemia Ceasario. The one who was teaching in ASAT her oldest brother (GIL) was stab to death. I don't know who did it. My cousin Ency from Minehill New Jersey that her sister have text her about the incident.  Do you know also my Aunt Faustina (Tinay) The Teacher who was Teaching in Urdaneta his husband died when a fall down while taking a bath at there bathroom. May their souls rest in peace, Amen.  

**************** Hi M. Lito..I never miss thebreakfast there because I love free food..! I still know the tune; I can write it for you and record it, then will send it to you as an MP3..Just give me time cuz that process takes a few hours to do..But hey, I am retired and I got nothing but time in my hands..I am sorry to hear re: the deaths you mentioned..I am copy/pasting ur e-mail to the Asingan Journal so those who can read it ( if they know then person concerned ) can say at least an OUR FATHER and a HAIL MARY for their souls....

I believe the players of the Xmas music during the Misa de Gallo ( called Deana ) are: Isaac Guillermo, saxophone, Antonio Sison ( snare drum ) and I believe, Mr. Badua ( can't remember his first name ) oboe..As far as I know, they are now members of the heavenly orchestra up there in heaven...

a feedback from Nep..

Hi Vic, That was a remarkable and funny Christmas story. It brings back memories of early morning masses in San Juan, Metro Manila  that I went to. Every year I planned to attend all 16 days of simbang gabi/Misa de Gallo but never completed one.   Anyway the story of the missing arroz caldo was really funny. My memory of Asingan is of a perfect town where all people are gentle and nice and petty thievery does not happen. I've been to your town twice, remember.  I guess no town is perfect.   Regards to Nene, Nep

Feedback from Nep

Hi Vic, That was a remarkable and funny Christmas story. It brings back memories of early morning masses in San Juan, Metro Manila  that I went to. Every year I planned to attend all 16 days of simbang gabi/Misa de Gallo but never completed one.   Anyway the story of the missing arroz caldo was really funny. My memory of Asingan is of a perfect town where all people are gentle and nice and petty thievery does not happen. I've been to your town twice, remember.  I guess no town is perfect.   Regards to Nene,   Nep

One Christmas in Asingan...

During the time of Fr, de Guzman the church choir members were treated with an early breakfast right after the singing of each Misa de Gallo ( Mass when the rooster crows, is which really #$%^& early!). Your personal sacrifice started when you have to wake up early..At 4:00 am the church bells ring and when it does, most of the dogs in our area would start barking, then a 4 piece band would go around the poblacion playing a lively music (Geez, the tune is still in my head up to now).Then you have to wash your face with ice cold water ( no plumbing in Asingan in the 50s ), then go up the choir loft to find all the singers half asleep and walking about like zombies.. Then the Misa de Gallo begins with the accompaniment of Jose de Guzman's playing the violin.Jose is the daddy of Fr. Lazaro and he played a violin. If the sound of his violin won't wake you up completely, nothing will..Some notes in his violin would knock the wax out from your ears. This took place for 9 mornings and the only incentive I had then is the breakfast that comes after the mass...Everything worked well except for one morning.."Hey, I heard we will have arroz caldo today" whispered one singer to me.."Wowie, " I said..After the Mass, we went up the convento, trying not to look too eager for the repast..Upon reaching the kitchen, we saw the table served with plates but but no arroz caldo! In fact there was NO FOOD! When Fr. de Guzman came up, everyone was asking "Where is the food??" He said, someone donated a whole kettle of arroz caldo..It was brought here early this morning.." Then everybody started looking for the kettle. Nothing..Then somebody looked out of the window and shouted: "I saw the kettle..It is in the church garden!" Bad news!A couple of guys ran down. When they came back, they were holding an empty kettle, still with traces of arroz caldo lining its bottom. "Oken na da!" cried one singer.."tinakaw da iti arroz caldo!" ( #$^&*(@, they stole the arroz caldo!)..That morning, someone forgot to lock the back door of the convento ..Before the end of the mass a group of Asingan bums, might have seen it open, went up and run away with the kettle and helped themselves at the garden.."Dont worry" said father..he asked his nephew to run to the Villar bakery to buy enough hot pandesal while some of the girls cooked some scrambled eggs. Top the menu with coffee and everybody was pleased as anything!We never learned who stole the arroz caldo, but Christmas evecame 2 days after and we forgot all about it...

GLIMPSES OF THE TPL TALENT SHOW

AS PROMISED SOMETIME AGO, HERE ARE PHOTOS FROM THE TORONTO PUBLIC LIBRARY TALENT SHOW...

OH HOLY NIGHT in Asingan

OH HOLY NIGHT in Asingan

The first time I heard O Holy Night was inside the St. Louis Bertrand church. This was about 1950 or 51. This piece is usually reserved for the Midnight Mass, Dec. 24, the highlight of the Christian Christmas celebration..Inside a packed church smelling of human sweat and cheap perfumes, I was lucky to get a seat..Then I heard O HOLY NIGHT sung by a Soprano who was a part of the RJC ( Rizal Junior College) choir handled by Mr. Juan Salinda who was then the school Principal..The song woke me up ( hey, the sermon was boring and it was past my bedtime ) and I thought I was already in heaven listening to Angel's voices..Then they followed it by the SILENT NIGHT version with "7 voices"..This version is done best by a choir with at least 7 good singers. I said to myself: I wish I could join the group..I know they were all high school people and I was still an elementary school kid, still wearing short pants.

But years later, my wish came true..That was during the time of Fr. Lazaro de Guzman when I joined his choir out of my love for music..That batch consisted of Josie Casimiro Velasco ( now deceased ) plus other local singers who were contributing their spare time to volunteer work in church. When Fr. de Guzman left Asingan, his place was taken by Fr.Jose V. Ferrer, Some new voices joined too.. Singers leave, new ones come in. This is about 1965..The remarkable new ones were the Delmendo sisters; Julie, Mildred and Susan. Julie eventually became a soloist and her favorite piece was O HOLY NIGHT.I always accompanied her in the church organ.

 Fr. Ferrer had a tape recorder at that time ( a first one in Asingan ) and I was also hooked with this tape recording hobby. One time I borrowed it, and we recorded Julie's O HOLY NIGHT, a very suitable music to play before the start of the Misa de Gallos which commences every December 16 in Asingan.. Her vocal rendition  was in the middle section of that tape..After Xmas, I recorded for Father Ferrer, a series of Jazz tunes  from the start of the tape to the beginning of Julie's O HOLY NIGHT.  Of course I did not erase Julie's song. Erasing something beautiful  would be a "crime."

Months later, one afternoon in May, there was a celebration in the church yard  and it was the habit of Father Ferrer to play music through a powerful speaker at the top of the belfry or bell tower on such ocassions to attract people to come.. That music was loud enough to  be heard in many of the barriosof Asingan.There he was, chatting and  laughing with some CURSILLISTAS listening to that fine Jazz music tape which I made for him.( now playing out of the powerful speakers atop the bell tower). Suddenly, the jazz music faded and the intro for O HOLY NIGHT came in..Then Julie's voice, singing the Christmas song, wafted over the air space in Asingan! Holy Toledo, and it was still May!

 The cursillistas were laughing as Fr. Ferrer rushed back to the CONVENTO to switch off his tape recorder! He put on the radio instead then he came back down with an embarrased smile..Well, it is not a crime or a sin to be playing Xmas songs in May or June..I play them anytime I feel like listening to one! But only in  private. I am sure not only the cursillistas were laughing when they heard that song played that afternoon several months before Christmas!

*******

Thirty years later in 2003, in Asingan, I played this Christmas Carol again. This time I accompanied Susan Delmendo Santos, Julie's younger sister who came all the way from Los Angeles to celebrate the Christmas Program in her school, the Colegio de San Luis Beltran which now she owns. This is the new name of the Rizal Junior College, also named Rizal Academy at one time. During the rendition, I used a Yamaha keyboard which I borrowed from Leah Rame Apuyod ( sorry if I mispell this name) a businesswoman in Asingan. Leah 's parents Max and Julie Rame were close friends of my parents.

It was an uncanny experience playing the song again in Asingan. Julie is supposed to come home too that Christmas but she did not make it..But Susan did a good job, singing it with great feeling on the stage in front of the school. She is also a very good singer like the rest of her siblings. And she did it so well that the audience keep clapping and cheering even in the middle of the song just to show their appreciation..Due to some technical difficulties, I had to stay far away from her. My spot was beside the Sound Man who was  outside of the school fence. Reason why is that the cable for my keyboard connecting it to the Sound System was so short so I had to stay close with the amplifier.While I was playing, I was surrounded by children watching me, and a TV cameraman too was there shooting it for the Delmendo cable...It was a December night but it was so HOT that my shirt wasdrenched with sweat due to the weather and the stressful situation..But I played in all kinds of tight places here in Toronto, and doing it in Asingan after 30 years is really a big thing for me..

I  must have played O HOLY NIGHT a thousand times already but I never get tired doing it. .God willing I am playing  it again this coming Christmas eve 2005 at St. John's here in Toronto to accompany a group of five young brilliant  singers. Two of them are my grandaughters, Mia and Emma of whom I have written a few times in my blogs..

May God Bless Us All THIS COMING CHRISTMAS SEASON!

Some graduates from Class '58

The above photo was taken about 1999, 38 years after we parted from the Rizal Junior College. Back row, standing: Junior Velasco (deceased), Rogelio Agpaoa who finished Engineering and did a contract abroad in Africa..Doc Teofilo (Ruben) Bugayong who runs a clinic in Urdaneta, Rudy Manuel, who arrived in Canada not long ago. Front row, sitting : Johnny Sindayen, still good-looking after all these years, Col. Amado Benito whome we never thought would join the military, Miss Julieta Mariano the "muse" during our get together and myself..This priceless photo was taken in Rudy's farm..So, who else is interested in signing up for a class reunion, '58 graduates?

once upon a time ...part 3

Monyang and nana Talen never had any children. Nana Talen however had a few relatives who worked with her in the store. One of them was Esperanza or Esper for short. She was so pretty that she was crowned as Miss Asingan during one town fiesta.

She was the store cashier for a long time.She alternated shifts with nana Talen..Esper was nice and sweet to me but other times she would snap at me, ready to bite my head off. This is especially when I did not return the coke bottles on time. Those days, Coke was known as Coca Cola. Same with Pepsi Cola. The other popular pop drinks were Royal Tru Orange, Cosmos Sarsaparillia and some others. Each time you buy coke, you would pay only 10 centavos or 15, but you have to return the empties the next time you buy again. But sometimes I do not return them on time hoarding 5 or 8 bottles at home.And so Esper would get cross at me demanding the empties ASAP.. And  because of my addiction to chocolates, I keep coming back to the store.

I remember the time when there was a promotion for Coca Cola. There is a special crown which featured a drawing of a small coke bottle in the cap under the cork lining. We used to call it TANSAN . If you save 10 of these marked crowns, you can redeem them for a set of 24 miniature sized coca cola bottles set inside a miniature Coca Cola case. The marked crowns can be redeemed from the Coca Cola truck that comes every Tuesdays and Fridays. If you just buy at random, it takes forever to gather 10 marked crowns. But I discovered that the color of the marked crown is yellowish ( the inside of the crown which is unpainted) compared to the greenish hue of the unmarked ones. So each time I buy Coca Cola, I first raise the bottle and carefully peek the color of the tansan which you can see through the bottle. Several times, when I buy a coke, I would raise the bottle, take a look, then put it back when the tansan is greenish. "What the heck are you doing??" Esper would sometimes ask visibly annoyed.." Oh nothing, just checking something.." I never told her my secret otherwise she might keep all the marked bottles for herself. I remember I collected so many of those souvenier bottles and cases and I proudly displayed them in our living room. Those were pretty!

 

After I graduated from Grade 6 from Dupac Intermediate school, , I seldom go there anymore because I started to attend First year High Schooll at the Rizal Junior College. Two tragedies also befell Monyang: first is the attempted midnight robbery on the CONO which cost the life of one of his employees. The second one is the big fire that burned the whole CONO to the ground. I was at home when these events occured. However these will be treated in another entry..

A "Myth" about Cabingcolan

This is a myth about Cabingcolan, my barrio. I want to share this story which I heard from my Lolo Ilas Cisnero a tale which still   lingers in my mind.

Probably between 1915 to 1923, baseball was still the most popular sport in our country and in the USA. The most important player then was Babe Ruth..Today Basketball is supreme and Michael Jordan is the "King.." But let's go back to the baseball in Pangasinan circa 1920's..

The most popular baseball players in Pangasinan were the four Ramos brothers: : Berting (Felixberto), Eng, Eping (Jose) , and Nador. Nachong, Fidel's father was not included this time because he was busy with social commitments.The Ramos brothers were in the Asingan Team. The elite team in Pangasinan at that time was Lingayen.

My lolo said, Lingayen has always been the yearly champion. Then the Pangasinan baseball league took place in Asingan, at the the "Rancho Carpo Velasco" (Bangkag).. . The town plaza was not big enough for the Major League tournament. . Everybody was surprised when the Asingan Team won the league, beating the elite team from Lingayen. Everyone hardly believed this remarkable achievement of the Asingan Team, so there was a re-match. They won for 2nd time!. The league was held in summer time around March or April. The vicinity to be used for the baseball league was already planted with crops ready for the next season. But the Asingan baseball fans stepped on all the crops and flattened them, just so they can watch the game!

One of the Ramos Brothers named this South Westside area of Poblacion Cabingcolan. . My lolo Ilas did not mentioned who among the Ramos brothers give it such a name. Before, I thought Cabingcolan came from the word Bingcol which means earthworm defecation( Humus), but I was wrong. And so Cabingcolan became the favorite hang-out of the the Ramos Brothers . They became very close friends to the Aquinos and Carlos families in the community, They bought a piece of property from the Aquino Family next to the subdivision and it became the present site of 2 houses; one for Fidel and the other for his sister Leticia Shahani..

The Cabingcolan Youth Organization was then created and it became very active after World War II ( from the 50's, up to the 90's). I was elected as a Vice president of the CYO in early 1980. I have'nt heard anything from the organization and I do hope it still exists. This story is based on some tales from my late Lolo Ilas Cisnero, If you have something to add or a different version story please come forward and e-mail it to me so I will be corrected. Thank you and Happy blogging!

Arsenio Macanas

ONCE UPON A TIME...part 2

Not many of the younger Asinganians would know that Patrick Stewart, the Enterprise Captain of Star Trek series looked very much  like MONYANG. The eyes, the shape of the face and most of all the head. Both of them are as bald as a cue ball.... I will continue my memories of this Asinganian and his rice mill. .

 

At the back of his rice mill is a small yard where he kept two pets: an owl and a monkey..The monkey was leashed to a long chain which allowed him to go back and forth on a long and sturdy bamboo which is about roughly 6 or 7 feet long.Both ends of the bamboo were fastened to two trees. Kids those days do not know the meaning of the word privacy. In fact we haven't even heard that English word yet. So one day one of us just went through that private door and voila! it was a whole new world to us. You know how kids are fond of animals. Every afternoon, after class we would just barge in there and tease the monkey, sometimes throw him a banana. The monkey is a good catcher, like a baseball player. Or we would stare at the owl which naturally stared back. You seldom see one at daytime for these birds are nocturnal. They sleep during the day and hunt mice at night. But that fellow is in a cage, can't even fly. (At that time we do not know anything about animal cruelty). You could stare at each other for hours, waiting for the first one to blink. Strangely enough, no one rebuked us for trespassing.

 

Beyond this mini zoo is another playgroud..The "mountain" of TAEP coming out of the CONO.The mountain is quite high, sometimes it could be higher than the top of the CONO. This is where we spent hours playing, going up and jumping, pretending to be swordsmen or just playing tag while climbing and rolling down the dusty slopes. Pretty soon our hair would be coated with rice husk dusk, but nobody cared..It was fun!

 

One day, one of our female classmates heard about the zoo and the "mountain". "Wanna join us?" we invited her.." Sure!" she said..." as long as some other girls would join me.." After our afternoon class, the usual group dropped by the place, this time with 3 girls who are first timers..First they admired the monkey.."He is so cute, reminds me of one of our classmate.".said one of the girls..

Then we went to the "mountain.." Some of the boys were doing their usual stunt: they would go up the peak, then jump as far as they can down, trying to land on their feet.The landing spots are always soft of course but it takes quite a skill to land without making a spill. Then one of us told our guest MARIANA ( this is not her real name of course!).."Why dont you try?" MARIANA is beautiful, she belongs to one of the rich prominent families in Asingan.She was a "classy" kid.She never socialized with boys, especially with bums like the ones in our group.."No, no..I am scared.." she said..""There is nothing to be scared about.." You can do it!.." ..Oh, Okay"..She went up to the top.

All boys stopped what they were doing and holding their breaths, stared at her, .."Now, jump!" shouted somebody..Being her first time, she jumped just like that, landed on her feet first, then she fell on her face akwardly into the pile of TAEP..Her feet stuck up, her skirt covered her back and she immediately struggled to stand. A few of us rushed out to help her stand, asking her if she's okay.  Some TAEP stuck to her lips because she landed face down. A couple of boys started laughing. "Let's go home," she told her girl friends as she brushed her dress clean. She never cried or made any fuss.

But she did not speak to any of us the next day ( and for quite a long time ) because one of the boys blabbed the next day about the colour of her underwear when she made that jump the previous afternoon!

ONCE UPON A TIME IN ASINGAN

ONCE UPON A TIME IN ASINGAN

I grew up in Asingan during a time when there was no TV, movie theatres or any kind of electronic entertainment..In fact there was not even any electricity yet!

Some rich Asinganians at that time have radios, particularly the Chinese merchants. My bedroom is just a hundred feet away from the RICE CONO of Monyang, a soft spoken Chinese merchant who at that time was married to an elderly lady.Both of them ran the rice processing mill plus a retail store . When I was about 7 years old I always go to that store to buy snacks, especially American chocolates..! At one time, there were American chocolates in Asingan, believe it or not.. Each time I come home from the Dupac Intermediate School ( now Angela Valdez ), I always pass through the open door of the store just to see if they have some yummy chocolate bars in stock..They had Milky Way and Babe Ruth before...And Milky Way cost only 15 centavos! If I see a full jar, I would go straight to my dad and pump him for some snack money...And he is one person who can not say NO to his kids especially me.

Then at night, I could hear Monyang's radio play some of the 1950 hits ( I am narrating events that took place in the early 50s..) There is this daily radio program that goes on every 7:00 pm to 7:30 pm..Manila Hit parade..The announcer, in between jokes, would play the 10 top hits in Manila..Of course, since there are 10 songs and each song is about 3 minutes each, then he has no time to play the complete song..He would just play a part of a song, cuts it, then play some commercials..But he always play completely the 3 top tunes..I would be lying down in bed, straining my ear to the open window to listen to the program..But many, many times just before they would play the 2nd or Number one song, somebody would change the station to a Chinese Broadcast from Mainland China! I assume of course that it is Monyang, the Big Boss!

We can not afford to buy the batteries that would run the radio at that time..Food was always the priority..Transistor radios were still a few years away, so Monyang ( and some other radio buffs in Asingan ) rely on those vacuum tube radios which run on batteries..Oh those radio sets would suck DC power like vampires! You need around 30 D size batteries 10 connected in parallel and 20 connected in series...Those dry cells cost a fortune and the whole battery would be enough to buy food for 5 days! But when my Mom has extra money, she would give in to my needling her..but it is not often that I buy the cells for that antique DC powerd radio in our living room...I did the soldering myself ( I was already an electronics whiz kid at that early age ) and for a precious few weeks, we would listen to some comedies from Manila..Like Edong Mapangarap with Eddie San Jose, Sylvia la Torre and Pugo ( Mariano Contreras ) ..Togo was also his sidekick but he died earlier..Plus those hit parades that come every night, or the weekly KAPITAN KIDLAT over DZRH..Or BUHAY TSUPER every Friday evenings! After a few weeks, we notice the sound getting weaker and weaker..Sometimes we try to expose the batteries to the sun so it would boost up the power..Sometimes it does, but sometimes it doesn't...When our radio conks out, we have to rely again on Monyang's radio..Its better than nothing and it keeps me well informed of the hit tunes in Manila which not many in Asingan would ever know...! All the other kids know only the records that the local Sound System Operators would play..Yes sir, Asingan, before the advent of electrical power, was literally living in the Dark Ages!

CATS VS. DOGS

Cats and dogs

The Difference Between Dogs and Cats



1. A dog will tilt his head and try to understand every word you say.



A cat will ignore you and take a nap.



2. A cat looks silly on a leash.



3. When you get home, a dog will be happy and lick your face.



A cat will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place.



4. A dog will give you unconditional love until the day he dies.



A cat will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day
you were born.



5. A dog knows when you're sad, and he'll try to comfort you.



A cat doesn't care how you feel, as long as you remember where the can
opener is.



6. A dog will bring you your slippers.



A cat will drop a dead mouse in your slippers.



7. When you take them for a ride, A dog will sit on the seat next to you.



A cat has to have her own private basket, or she won't go at all.



8. A dog will come when you call him, and he'll be happy.



A cat will have someone take a message and get back to you, maybe.



9. A dog will play fetch with you all day long.



The only thing a cat will lay with all day long is small rodents or bugs,
preferably ones that look like they're in pain.



10. A dog will wake you up if the house is on fire.



A cat will quietly sneak out the back door.

BRAVO EMMA

  Yesterday Sunday, my  grandaughter Emma performed solo at our church for the first time..Shes only 6 years old but she is one gutsy lady!  It was her 3rd time to sing in public in front of a microphone..Like any singer, she finds out it is a different experience each time you sing in public..for you also have to consider not only your feelings but also that of your audience and also their reactions..Our present parish Priest seem to want the Mass to be a psudo-social event so after the ablution ( washing of the cups used for Communion ) that's the time people in the congregation with talents can sometimes perform..But these talents come few and far between..Lots of talents out there but they are just too shy to come out in the open..But not Emma!   So after the Communion, she went with her Mom into this small room at the back of the altar with her pretty red dress...Then I knocked on her door when Father gave me the cue and she came out..walked to the microphone..I played the intro to Andrew Lloyd Webber's THINK OF ME ( From PHANTOM OF THE OPERA) and she started her song calmly, keeping on to the end with faultless tempo and pitch..It was at the 2nd last note in the cadenza ( very high G ) that the audience broke in applause...They never stopped clapping even when the Padre took her in his arms, raise her up to show her to the people! Its because she was too small for everyone to see, especially those sitting at the back...Her sister Mia was in the audience ( Mia is an accomplished singer too ) together with Caitlin ( another singer/soloist  in our choir ) stepped down to the pews so they can see her...Felt so happy, so proud..so I just went to her and kissed her on the cheek right after I stood up from the piano bench...BRAVO EMMA!

Calling all Class 58, Rizal Academy

Last Summer here in Toronto, I had a chat with former Miss Remedios Lopez one of class '58's teacher.."Why not organize a class reunion?, " she said..Nueva Domaoan was also present at that time..She seconded the idea..."Why not?" I said. So I took the first step: I published a list of the class '58 graduates copied from an original Graduation Invitation printed on that year prior to our graduation from the Rizal Academy..Please check the names and if you know the whereabout of any of these names above, please e-mail me and I will try to contact them myself..Then we will finalize the reunion, maybe here in the US or maybe in our hometown..Thank you!

feedback from Angelito Domaoan

Hi Vic: Where did you get that story of Pedro Calosa? I have a hunch that since Nene is working in the Library she must found something regarding the history of Pangasinan particularly Tayug. I remember my grandfather Alvaro Esliza talking how the original convento of Asingan was burned by rebels in connection with the Malong revolt.(Asingan has the biggest convento in Pangasinan prior to the Malong revolt) I remember my grandfather talking with an oldtimer Laki Messiong Malalang (his Godfather) during his 1st and silver wedding anniversary. He was telling that one time the convento had encircled the other half near the camarin in front of the house of my grandfather.(This building was called TABACALERA) There WAS also a caballeresa where the keep their horses. The convento, at one time was connected to the place where the priest stay to dress up before celebrating mass. Remember this story came from me which I heard from my old folks. Thanks for jogging my memory with your story on the Tayug rebelion.****** This e-mail is from my friend Angelito Domaoan an Asinganian who is now residing in New Jersey.

A BALIKBAYAN'S DIARY, part 2

Before our trip to the Philippines, I booked a hotel in Makati through the Internet. It is like making a random choice from a bevy of postcards: all of the hotel photos look beautiful. I selected Dusit because of its location..it is right at the back of SM Makati, which is just a few minutes walk away from Gloririeta and also Landmark..And also the prices of their Executive suites  was on discount  for Balikbayans.100 US$ for one night! Who couldn't refuse?..The website do not have a direct link, so I have to dial a 800 number and talk with a receptionist. We talked in Tagalog of course. In short, she booked me for an Executive Suite, gave her my VISA number just for security After I put down the phone I felt proud of myself..that is, until we arrived at the Hotel.

After the fiasco at the Manila airport ( see part 1 ), we headed to the Dusit Hotel..On the way, the driver was asking us to what Hotel we are going ..Dusit I said..How much? he asked..This driver is starting to get into my nerves asking personal questions like that. 100 US$, I said trying to be calm. Thats too expensive, he said..With that kind of money, I know of a Hotel right beside Glorrietta which would get you a whole week end..Whats the name of the Hotel?I asked. ..Oakwood, he said..Aha I said to myself. That is the building occupied once by those Military hotheads who wanted to stage a coup against the President..They planted bombs in the lobby and for a while, they made international headlines and some spot in the 6:00 PM news..That place is not even a Hotel, its a Condominium building!..Upon reaching a fork at the EDSA he said again So you want to go to Oakwood?..I will take this way going there.. Pare, I said..Our companions in the other van are going to Dusit.At this point I dont want to be losing each other again...Could you just mind your driving and bring us to Dusit?..He made a quick left turn and said OK Boss!..Tarantado..I said silently.

We finally reached Dusit..The bell hops took our bags to the designated room. I finished the paperwork and then took the keys from the Concierge. When we got to our room, I found it to be very small, hardly the Executive ones as advertised..I stormed down the lobby again.."How come you gave me that room when I asked for an Executive room which you advertised for a discounted price??" Sorry sir, there was a slight problem..There is now a big conference at the Dusit so all the Executive Suites were taken by the Delegates..Geez, we were bumped off from the rooster..Sorry sir..Then you should give me a lower price then..No sir, 100 is the real price for a standard room, cant do otherwise..Susmaryosep I muttered..havent used that word for a long time..but being a man who do not like to argue, I just left the desk..Its just a room to sleep anyway, I said to myself..When I tried to explain it to my wife (who is not as lenient as me)..she screamed "I will be the one to go down there!". No more, no more.I said, putting my foot down.I am tired, sleepy and we still have to attend to our visitors here..I tried to divert from the problem by opening one of the luggages:"Look at the goodies we have for you..!"..and the excitement of gift giving began... "HO-HO-HO, AND TO ALL,  A GOOD-NIGHT!"

PEDRO CALOSA AND THE BATTLE OF TAYUG

Calosa's early life

Pedro Calosa was born in Bauang, La Union but his family migrated to Tayug during the early part of the American Occupation. During a cholera outbreak, both his parents died. Pedro and another brother left for Hawaii where they spent the next years in hard labour working in sugar and pineapple fields. In 1926, he organized Filipino contract workers to form a union and instigated them to strike so they could demand better wages and living condition. He failed to ask for the needed reforms and he even went to jail for being such a "trouble-maker".After serving his time in prison, he was deported back to the Philippines. He transformed into a dissident ready for the role he was about to play.

He stayed a while in Manila but the city's environment did not suit his rebellious nature. He returned to Tayug, but found the town's social environment worse than Manila. Within a few months, he got into so much trouble that the PC put him under surveillance. But he was a clever fellow. The authorities were not able to gather enough evidence to put him in jail.

The Philippine National Association

In 1928, he founded a secret society called Philippine National Association. Membership in this society is so strict and secretive that the law did not learn of its existence until much later. By mid-30's about 1000 farmers were already members.

Calosa's achievement had its problems particularly his differences of opinion with some of his officers. Many of them then wanted to start the rebellion. But Pedro, having seen the American military might in Pearl Harbour wanted to wait for a while. Finally he gave in reluctantly. They chose Tayug to be the starting point of their rebellion.

The Rebellion begins

On the afternoon of January 10, 1931 Pedro Calosa and Cesario Abe ( one of his officers ) notified all their members that they are going to attack Tayug that night. The municipality is still under the stupor of the New Year's celebration. Members of the PC detachment always went to bed early.

Shortly after midnight, the houses of 2 municipal policemen in the neighbouring town of San Nicolas were burned. This was done as a diversionary tactic. It was also the signal for 40 farmers armed with nothing but boloes and old shot guns to commandeer two buses and ride to Tayug. At the outskirsts of the town, 20 or more villagers, someon foot, some on horseback converged on the Municipio. Around 1:00 am, 50 or 60 farmers ( including 14 young women ) assembled near the constabulary barracks.

One of the girls lured the lone sentry from his post and her male companions just hacked him to death. The barracks was raided completely, guns and ammo were stolen and the building was set on fire. Eight of the eleven enlisted men escaped. The officers-in-charge were shot by the rebels. By 1:30 a.m., Tayug fell to the rebels. All the townspeople, in fright, rushed to the countryside.

Tayug under the Raiders

For the next 5 or 6 hours,, the raiders dominated Tayug. The Presidencia, with its hated land records went up in flames as well as the Post Office. Looters broke into 35 houses, stripped them of valuables and then put these to the torch. When dawn blossomed over the Cordillera Mountains, the rebels walked on the still decorated streets and went to church. The rebels requested for a Mass and a breakfast right after. The priest and his helpers obliged them. One of the rebels told the priest he should leave for his own safety. The priest and his helper were just too happy to comply.Thus the rebels had nothing more to do but to wait.

Retribution came swiftly. An hour and a half after the attack on the PC Barracks, a survivor jogged into San Quintin which is about 15 kms. away. He informed a telegraph operator of the events in Tayug. And immediately, messages were sent to Dagupan and to Manila. Authorities in Lingayen responded accordingly. A large number of soldiers were sent to Eastern Pangasinan. The Philippine Division of the US Army ( manuevering in nearby Lingayen Gulf ) was placed on standby alert. Around 6:30 am, the first Constabulary detachment; fifteen steel helmeted troopers and 2 Junior Officers from Dagupan, arrived in Tayug. Thirty minutes later, carefully deployed riflemen open fired on the convento. The rebels answered with defiant gunfire.

The tide turns around

The gun battle raged for several hours. Until late afternoon, the outcome remained in doubt. There was a stalemate because good marksmen were on both sides..By evening, ammunitions on both sides were almost gone. Then 100 soldiers arrived from Manila to boost the morale and firepower of the authorities.

A witness related a dramatic end to the episode. The convento doors opened. It is said that a young woman carrying a Philippine flag over her head stepped out. At first all guns were silent. Waving the flag and marching across the plaza, she went towards the statue of Dr. Jose Rizal. For an unknown reason, as soon as she reached the statue, a volley of gunfire from the Constabulary thudered unexpectedly. The woman collapsed at the base of the monument and the flag fell on her body. The report never clarified which side killed her.A storming party entered the bullet ridden church and arrested the rebels who threw down their empty weapons. The battle of Tayug is over and Pedro Calosa was arrested.

 

E-mail chats

MR. Vic Costes.. I sense that you are a BLOGGER, I respect you that way. blogging to this bulletin board is nice especially about our hometown Asingan but as what Mr. Vic Costes said as long as they are not "slanderous" that would be fine. WELCOME BLOGGER just do it! Blog - A shared on-line journal where people can post diary entries about their personal experiences.

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To Mr. Arsenio Macanas: Thank you for your kind e-mail..Yes, I started out as a blogger, then I branched out as the old-time writer/journalist/what-ever-you want to call it who learned how to use the computer. Blogging is very good, sometimes it is therapeutic(pardon me if my spelling on this word is out for lunch but my dictionary is nowhere to be found), but to be a REAL BLOGGER you have to express out ( in good grammar of course ) everything and anything your mind pops out at the exact moment when your fingers are at the keyboard..Since you are INCOGNITO at that time, then heck, you can say IN PUBLIC that Mr. ABC is running around with Mrs. XYZ who is married to Mr. So and So who seems to be in doubt about his sexuality.Or say I am getting sick of this world, too much crap in it, let me blow my brains out so I can get off.Or some other stuff which you want to shout out in cyberspace... But the Asingan Bulletin Board has its rules; we must post something which is safe even for a 12-year old girl to read. Which is good.Somewhere in the clutter of my hard drive, I still have those bits and pieces of my Blog..Do you have one too?..The best way we can do is to use hyperlinks which we can leave in the Pang.Org so readers of the Asingan Bulletin Board can access to our Blogs without using much of its precious space..Some Blog entries can take several pages you know! Anyway before signing off, I'd like to know if you are related to Brigida Macanas from Cabincolan..She and I belonged to a certain church club in the 60s in Asingan..In the meantime, Happy Blogging!

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To Vic Costes: So you are the professional blogger! That's good for us. We could learn from you and I can learn from the "Pro blogger". I am just a little guy from the corner. I will not even consider myself as an amateur blogger. You are right blogging should be in good grammar "in any language" but in my opinion not necessarily a very good grammar. The thought, good sense, believable entries is okey, doesn't it? I understand as a pro like you are it's sensitive. Of Course that is your profession that's respectable, but since most of us here are "INCOGNITO" doesn't matter anyway. Brigida Macanas Daroy is my Aunt. She is already a widow. Her husband Wellie Daroy pass away last year. She's living here in San Diego. By mentioned can't find the word from dictionary probably out of lunch? Try this manong.. http:\\webword.info\ that is FREE down load and if you got this, never ever think to try to open your antique dictionary book anymore. This is very powerful word finding, thousands of new words and very handy too. After the downloading it will sets up the icon to the right bottom side of the screen and also it'll be accessable anytime even the computer is busy of any application work. Just one click and you're on, good luck!

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Hi Arsenio..I think that word does not show up because the spelling is really bad!! Sorry about that!! Nobody, including me is perfect in Spelling..But I will try to look for that @#$%^ word until I find the right spelling...Sure I will be happy to leave a few tips on blogging..but it may take time,... You know blogging is like writing a diary, just be sure the diary is interesting to read..If you think what you wrote is interesting, then for sure other people will like to read it..Sorry to note that WRITING is a dissapearing art/skill during this era of cellphones and computers...but we should not let it dissapear..I can tell by your sentences that you are a GOOD WRITER too ( takes one to spot one ) Just keep on writing as much as you can... I hate Taglish ( potpouri of English and Tagalog ) One should either write ALL English or ALL Tagalog..The text habit is also "corrupting" some young writers now..They seem to use shortcuts in text as acceptable writing..This is what I mentioned about "correct grammar", but whatever you say, people will still write the way they want to write...Am sorry to hear about your Aunt Brigida..Say Hi to her if u call her once in a while..She has a nice voice before..I think they are good friends with Flora Cisnero also from Cabingcolan.Saw Flora last 2003 when Belo Malala took me to her house in the subdivision....We belong to the same choir in Asingan..Anyways, thanks for your e-mail..til the one comes along!!

*******

Hi Arsenio...A good BLOG ( Web Log ) is nothing else but good writing. Good writing is nothing else but good communication. Good communication is nothing else but sincerity in what you are saying and effectively saying what you want in writing which brings us back again to writing which is the first topic. It appears to be similar to a dog chasing its own tail, never stops until the dog is tired. A writer ( once you are into it ) will never stop writing until he is finished with his story/article/essay or novel. A good writer must be a good reader too, a good observer and a good conversationalist. From these varied experiences come the ideas that sometimes you are compelled to express out in writing. Maybe you want to do it as a Blog..This is like writing on a building's wall because passersby will read it..Or you might like to have a private diary for your thoughts which you may or may not like to delete when the right time comes. Sometimes writing is a good therapy esp. for the lonely, the disabled, the isolated. I started writing when I was in high school at the Rizal Academy. In our first year classroom, there was a list of the students and a bar graph in front of each name showing how many books they have read. At the end of the year, you can easily guess who has the longest bar! Then there was the theme writing notebook. Every month you are asked to write an article to be finalized on a theme notebook which the English teacher corrects. You have to write it in either black or blue ink. She corrects it with red. My themes in First year English got very high marks and I became the favorite of the teacher. One time I wrote my theme with red ink and she corrected it with blue and she never got mad at me for bresking this rule! WITHOUT KNOWING IT, I WROTE A BLOG ENTRY!! Have a good day, Arsenio!

These kids remind me of me...

Science answers

Answers to Questions on Science Tests By 5th and 6th graders:



The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top, and you sit on the bottom.



A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water and then forcing it through an aviator.



The inhabitants of Moscow are Mosquitoes.



It is so hot in some places that people there have to live in other
places.



Momentum is something you give a person when they go away.



Mushrooms always grow in damp places which is why they look like umbrellas.



The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.



The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.



Thunder is a rich source of loudness.



Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun, but I never have been able to make out the numbers.



In some rocks you can find the fossil footprints of fishes.



When planets run around and around in circles, we say they are orbiting. When people do it, we say they are crazy.



One of the main causes of dust is janitors.



For asphyxiation, apply artificial respiration until the victim is dead.



Blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.



A monsoon is a French gentleman.



The word "trousers" is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.



Rain is saved up in cloud banks.



To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.



Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you should.



Water vapor gets together in a big cloud. When it gets big enough to be called a drop, it does.



There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth because so many people are stomping around there these days.



The cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.



You can listen to thunder and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it, you got hit, so never mind.

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A BALIKBAYAN'S DIARY (PART ONE)

It has been 3 years since I visited Asingan. In fact, I spent Christmas 2003 in our hometown..As always, being a Balikbayan has its ups and downs, but the UPS usually outweigh the DOWNS when you come to see it from a different perspective...

Well, I say that the plane ride is the MOST EXCITING part in any trip. Especially boarding the the Hong Kong-Manila flight.Most of the passengers will be Filipinos. They will be very noisy of course, they are hyper because in less than 1 hour, they will land on Philippine soil. And they would smell the Manila air which is unlike any other kind of smell in the world.  The stewardess who would talk on the plane's PA system would be a Filipina and she would make the usual announcements in Tagalog. To a travel-worn Filipino who spent 14 hours 33,000 feet above the air with nothing to do but stare at a TV screen or read some book or pretend to be asleep, the announcement is really heartwarming. Forty-five minutes  after the take off from Hong Kong airport, the screen map will tell you where you are, atop the island of Luzon, heading for Manila.From Vigan to Urdaneta would be about 10 minutes, and you could feel the plane descending because your ears keep popping. Then as the plane noisily descends into Manila air space you eagerly stare through the window ( if you are lucky enough to secure a seat beside one).First will be a luminous cluster that will gradually expand into a city of assorted street and billboard lights. The plane touches the runway with a final bump-and-grind then it taxis around heading towards the terminal..The stewardess announces frantically in Tagalog, "Please do not open your hand carry compartments yet, wait 'til the plane completely stops.."Do some passengers listen? No. Either they are deaf in both ears, or they just don't give a shit at all..

Once you are out of the plane and trekking through the corridors leading to the Immigration, Customs and the Baggage area, the feeling is different. You are home. You  will see a Filipino posted every few feet away along the corridor staring at you. Are these security people? Or just plain nosy standbys? Such a gauntlet do not exist in other airports like Toronto or LA..Only in Manila, you would say. Then to the Immigration booths.No sweat here . It is in the Baggage retrieval section where you would start sweating bullets, and not because the air conditioning units are off..

A certain Juan dela Cruz would approach you asking if you need help.."that is my job to help newly arrived passengers", he says. No Thank you, you would say..He never gives up..He sticks annoyingly by your side like a lost puppy. Too bad you can't kick him away with your foot. So you give up. You say OK..Fast as lightning he produces a huge cart and start helping you retrieve your baggage as they show up at the carousel. Very helpful chap. He says he is doing it for free, that's what he is paid for. He has a name tag, working forTourism or something

All baggages are recovered. Now you have to wade to the alligator pool; the customs."What did you bring?" ask the inspector sometimes weilding a cutter meaning, cooperate otherwise I will open your baggages and you will have a hell of a time putting them back together..She keeps an eye as you bring out your pass port. She would smile slightly as she sees the fiver you slide inside between some passport pages. She hands you your baggage claim tickets. You push your cart out of the wading pool before an alligator bites off another chunk out of your ass...Freedom you say silently..Ooops, not quite. A uniformed staff asks for your ticket and while she counts your boxes and checks the receipts she would discretly ask;"May Chrstmas ba tayo diyan?" Well you arrived a few days before Christmas, so she is right! You could not even swear at her. She can raise a fuss by calling an airport guard. So you hand her a dollar bill and she lets you go.

The guy who saw you first is still on your side..The people who are supposed to meet you are nowhere in sight.."Do you have a ride?..Let me call you a taxi..These are safe, we know their plate numbers.." He asks. "No, No," you say remembering some stories of balikbayans who were fleeced by crooks doubling as taxi drivers. One rode on a taxi. In the middle of the trip, the car stalled.. Can you give it a push?..asked the driver..The balikbayan got out, pushed the car, the car started then it accelerated and disspaeared in a cloud of smoke..I hate to be in that balikbayan's shoes..All of his luggages and papers together with gifts from friends in Toronto to  relatives in the Philippines..

You say NO, but still your reception committee is still nowhere in sight..Then you say YES and minutes later, the reception committee found you! You can't cancel any more your request to the guard. ..And on top of that, the Juan dela Cruz whose job is supposed to be helping newly arrived balikbayans, starts asking 1000 pesos as a Christmas gift..At this time, you begin hating the word Christmas...

(to be continued)

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